Be cautious, understand the consequences of your decisions. You have to understand the consequences of every decision that you make. If you decide to be a writer, that's going to scale back your life, than when you decide to be an attorney. Y'know, if you send your kids to private school, then it's kind of like the federal budget, where if you spend money on one thing, but you have to cut on something else. So you just have to be aware, at all times, that every decision you make, has reverberations. And you have to understand those reverberations, and either you live with them, or you don't.
Neal GablerOur own personal salvation is to say, "I'm not going to judge myself, or let other people judge me, by my economic worth." We can't, obviously, control how other people will judge us, but - Life's too short to worry about those things. We can't control those things, but we can control how we feel about ourselves. And we work towards that. To say, "My life has been a success. Even if my bank account doesn't indicate it."
Neal GablerWe need more than simply financial education. We need to re-orient ourselves mentally, in terms of what the American Dream is, and how we fit into it. And we have to adjust ourselves to understand that finances are not everything in life. That would go a long way, towards changing this winner-and-loser mentality. We have to - Allow people to feel that sense of success, so they won't feel the sense of shame.
Neal GablerAnd financial problems are exactly the same thing. You're humiliated. You're ashamed. You're embarrassed about telling anyone that you are suffering financial difficulties.
Neal GablerYeah, we could have done things differently. But - If we'd done things differently, we wouldn't be who we are. We are the sum of the choices we make. Even the bad choices we make. I made a lot of bad choices, but on the other hand, I am who I am, and I'm proud of my work, and I'm proud of my family, and those are also the product of choices, including financial choices, that I made.
Neal GablerAnd it struck me that talking about our financial situation is very much like men not wanting to talk about sexual impotence. It's just not something you do. It's an embarrassment. It's a shame. It's a humiliation.
Neal GablerI didn't really care about money. I really wanted to follow my bliss. I really wanted to do the things that would make my life satisfying, in the fullest sense, and I was never thinking about money when I made those decisions. And I certainly didn't want my life to be driven by money. I'd seen my father's' life driven that way, and, although again, in retrospect, I understand fully why he did that, I didn't wanna live looking for that kind of financial reward. I wanted to live with the emotional, psychological, and even moral reward of doing the kind of work I do, which is, y'know, writing.
Neal Gabler