We need more than simply financial education. We need to re-orient ourselves mentally, in terms of what the American Dream is, and how we fit into it. And we have to adjust ourselves to understand that finances are not everything in life. That would go a long way, towards changing this winner-and-loser mentality. We have to - Allow people to feel that sense of success, so they won't feel the sense of shame.
Neal GablerI call it financial impotence, this notion of not having enough money, because it has the same characteristics as sexual impotence. And men will never talk about sexual impotence, no matter how close you are to someone, but financial impotence is an even greater barrier. And, I broke that omerta. I had people walk up to me in the grocery store - Several people, coming up to me and saying, "Gosh. Let me tell you my story." People are so pent up with their sense of financial impotence, that they're dying to get it out!
Neal GablerAnd financial problems are exactly the same thing. You're humiliated. You're ashamed. You're embarrassed about telling anyone that you are suffering financial difficulties.
Neal GablerWe need more than simply financial education. We need to re-orient ourselves mentally, in terms of what the American Dream is, and how we fit into it. And we have to adjust ourselves to understand that finances are not everything in life. That would go a long way, towards changing this winner-and-loser mentality. We have to - Allow people to feel that sense of success, so they won't feel the sense of shame.
Neal GablerAnd it struck me that talking about our financial situation is very much like men not wanting to talk about sexual impotence. It's just not something you do. It's an embarrassment. It's a shame. It's a humiliation.
Neal GablerWe lived in a very modest house. My father drove modest cars, we didn't travel, we didn't do any of the things that, were commensurate with the kind of income that he was making. So we got this kind of, double message, which was, y'know, "You work hard and you make as much money as you possibly can, but you don't spend any money." And you see how well I learned that lesson.
Neal Gabler