Bouillabaisse is only good because cooked by the French, who, if they cared to try, could produce an excellent and nutritious substitute out of cigar stumps and empty matchboxes.

Never take a solemn oath. People think you mean it.

No one can expect a majority to be stirred by motives other than ignoble.

To find a friend one must close one eye. To keep him...two.

People who have reformed themselves has contributed their full share towards the reformation of their neighbor.

Shall I give you my recipe for happiness? I find everything useful and nothing indispensable. I find everything wonderful and nothing miraculous. I reverence the body. I avoid first causes like the plague.

Bouillabaisse is only good because cooked by the French, who, if they cared to try, could produce an excellent and nutritious substitute out of cigar stumps and empty matchboxes.