The condition that is most disagreeable in your life becomes the most useful one. You know, I feel the same way about the U.S. Army. It was absolutely the worst experience of my life, and it was probably the single most valuable experience.

Every moment of one's existence one is growing into more or retreating into less. One is always living a little more or dying a little bit.

There are two kinds of brave men: those who are brave by the grace of nature, and those who are brave by an act of will.

When the time comes, they won't ask what kind of a Jew you are.

The Irish are the only men who know how to cry for the dirty polluted blood of all the world.

Every time a story about me appears in a newspaper, I am injured professionally.

Alimony is the curse of the writing class.