The first duty in life is to be as artificial as possible. What the second duty is no one has as yet discovered.

We in the House of Lords are never in touch with public opinion. That makes us a civilised body.

The Book of Life begins with a man and a woman in a garden. It ends with Revelations.

Do you really think it is weakness that yields to temptation? I tell you that there are terrible temptations which it requires strength, strength and courage to yield to.

When people talk to us about others they are usually dull. When they talk to us about themselves they are nearly always interesting.

Ah! realize your youth while you have it. Don’t squander the gold of your days, listening to the tedious, trying to improve the hopeless failure, or giving away your life to the ignorant, the common, and the vulgar. These are the sickly aims, the false ideals, of our age. Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you! Let nothing be lost upon you. Be always searching for new sensations. Be afraid of nothing.

Everything is dangerous, my dear fellow. If it wasn't so, life wouldn't be worth living.