Religion is the fashionable substitute for belief.

A bore is someone who deprives you of solitude without providing you with company.

She behaves as if she was beautiful. Most American women do. It is the secret of their charm.

When I am in trouble, eating is the only thing that consoles me. Indeed, as any one who knows me intimately will tell you, I refuse everything except food and drink. At the present moment I am eating muffins because I am unhappy. Besides, I am particularly fond of muffins.

Every American bride is taken there [Niagara Falls], and the sight of the stupendous waterfall must be one of the earliest, if not the keenest, disappointments in American married life.

He is really not so ugly after all, provided, of course, that one shuts one's eyes, and does not look at him.

The supreme vice is shallowness.