Most people are boring and stupid.

I have a simple taste, only the best.

The ancient historians gave us delightful fiction in the form of fact; the modern novelist presents us with dull facts under the guise of fiction.

Disobedience is man's original virtue.

In a very ugly and sensible age, the arts borrow, not from life, but from each other.

Oh, how I vainly wished to the bearded man in the sky that I was Neapolitan. Why? So I could bring in a fine Neapolitan pest control to help with Queensberry's problem before it gets out of hand.

Is insincerity such a terrible thing? I think not. It is merely a method by which we can multiply our personalities.