All art is quite useless.

You have never been poor, and never known what ambition is.

He was a hero to his valet, who bullied him, and a terror to most of his relations, whom he bullied in turn. Only England could have produced him, and he always said that the country was going to the dogs. His principles were out of date, but there was a good deal to be said for his prejudices.

The English public takes no interest in a work of art until it is told that the work in question is immoral.

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

One should always eat muffins quite calmly. It is the only way to eat them.

The final mystery is oneself.