There are three kinds of despots. There is the despot who tyrannizes over the body. There is the despot who tyrannizes over the soul. There is the despot who tyrannizes over the soul and body alike. The first is called the Prince. The second is called the Pope. The third is called the People.

Whenever cannibals are on the brink of starvation, Heaven, in its infinite mercy, sends them a fat missionary.

If people are dishonest once, they will be dishonest a second time. And honest people should keep away from them. (Lady Chiltern)

Life is not governed by will or intention. Life is a question of nerves, and fibres, and slowly built-up cells in which thought hides itself and passion has its dreams.

Just because a man has died for it, does not make it true.

I never play cricket. It requires one to assume such indecent postures.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.