In the old times men carried out their rights for themselves as they lived, but nowadays every baby seems born with a social manifesto in its mouth much bigger than itself.

The English country-gentleman galloping after a fox — the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable.

Young men want to be faithful, and are not. Old men want to be faithless, and cannot.

The worst thing to do with success, is to boast about it.

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.

Niagara Falls is simply a vast unnecessary amount of water going over the wrong way and then falling over unnecessary cliffs...The wonder would be if the water did not fall.

Death and vulgarity are the only two facts in the nineteenth century that one cannot explain away.