If you are young and you drink a great deal it will spoil your health, slow your mind, make you fat - in other words, turn you into an adult.
P. J. O'RourkeFrom National Lampoon, you go directly to Saturday Night Live, because it's a lot of the same people.
P. J. O'RourkeNever Refuse Wine. It is an odd but universally held opinion that anyone who doesn't drink must be an alcoholic.
P. J. O'Rourke