I mean, all alternative comedy is are comedians that have being doing it for so long, for so long, that they were relaxed enough to start becoming personal on stage.

Growing up there are always those kids who are only happy when they are making someone else upset. That is unfortunately just how some people are. Some people are just born with bad wiring.

I don't want to get into extended conversations with people on MySpace, because there are friends I have extended conversations with every day.

There's something kind of beautiful about that pure love of things. Like, "I'll show that I love the thing I love by hating everything else."

What I'm realizing as I get older is that a movie's mainstream success is just as unpredictable as a movie's cult success. Plenty of movies that are truly odd and deserve cults, don't have cults. It's just as much of a crapshoot to be a cult hit as it is to be a mainstream success. Isn't that weird?

But for the most part, for the majority of a stand-up audience, you better have new stuff they've not heard. And if you put an album out, just consider that material gone. At least that's how I see it.

I had a romance novel inside me, but I paid three sailors to beat it out if me with steel pipes.