I've had 14 bookings this season-eight of which were my fault, but seven of which were disputable.

Because of the booking I will miss the Holland game - if selected.

Then all the foreigners started coming over. I don't mind that but a lot of teams are laying out fortunes for ordinary players and that's no good for our youngsters coming through.

I never refused an autograph, never refused to buy someone a drink. Now I'm learning to say I've got other things on, instead of doing it and wondering why.

I've had 14 bookings this season-eight of which were my fault, but seven of which were disputable.

The drink? Yes, I've had tough times in my life, especially the last year, regarding my ex-wife, my kids, I nearly broke my neck, I was on death row with pneumonia.

I take responsibility for myself and what I do now.