It isn't what happens to us that causes us to suffer; it's what we say to ourselves about what happens.
Pema ChodronEverything is material for the seed of happiness, if you look into it with inquisitiveness and curiosity. The future is completely open, and we are writing it moment to moment. There always is the potential to create an environment of blame -or one that is conducive to loving-kindness.
Pema ChodronOne very powerful and effective way to work with this tendency to push away pain and hold on to pleasure is the practice of tonglen. โฏIn tonglen practice, when we see or feel suffering, we โฏbreathe in with the notion of completely feeling it, accepting it, and owning it.
Pema ChodronAt least once a year, I imagine that I am about to die. Looking back as truthfully as I can at my entire life, I give full attention to the things I wish hadnโt occurred. Recognizing these mistakes honestly but without self-recrimination, I try to rejoice in the innate wisdom that allows me to see so bravely, and I feel compassion for how I so frequently messed up. Then I can go forward. The future is wide open, and what I do with it is up to me.
Pema Chodron