Titus Bramble: The only explanation for his existence in the Premiership is that he is already here.

Is it unprecedented for two goalkeepers employed in a match comprising seven goals to be the fixture's most competent protagonists?

In comparison to the emotionally-charged axing of a striker, Ruud van Nistelrooy, who averaged 30 goals a season, even the sale of David Beckham for, in Real Madrid's opinion, "peanuts", and the never-explained departure of Jaap Stam appear to be the rational acts of a sage and far-sighted manger. To offload a player because he could not be reconciled with a role within the squad is a failing of management.

It is a certainty that Keegan would not have agreed to return unless Mike Ashley had committed to sanctioning a mammoth spending spree. The downside, which Keegan will soon discover, is the law of diminishing returns in a league that is now the richest in the world. The type of multi-million-pound investment that bankrolled the first Newcastle revival under Keegan is now two-a-penny. Buying success just isn't as easy as it used to be. The Premiership's paradox is that the more money there is, the more the art of management gains in value.

Mauricio Pellegrino has the pace of a tricycle with a flat tyre ridden by Luciano Pavarotti, and the turning speed of an oil tanker with its anchor set.

Arsenal's never-improving injury list increasingly attracts curiosity rather than sympathy.

On Saturday morning, one of the two teams still unbeaten in the Premiership occupied a modest seventh place. It is an illustration of the relentless pace being set at the top of the league in which every stumble is a serious fall and draws usually constitute two dropped points.