Don't wear eyeliner with too much facial hair. It looks strange.

Just because today is a terrible day doesn't mean tomorrow might not be the best day of your entire life. You just have to wake up and get there

There was a fence and there was this other van- So I go, 'Fence or van? Cause I'm crashing into one of them,' and I said 'Fence,' so I hit the fence and bounced into the van

It's cool to fall in love and grow old with someone.

They finally pushed me out, It's cool though cos I hae a dog.

He is the straight to video sequel to your summer hit movie. He is the verse to that song on the radio you have to hum cause you can’t remember the words. You couldn’t break this kid’s heart, he is so far beyond that. This is the kind of kid who blew out the candles on hope all alone for too many birthdays to remember. And no one has ever fallen in love with anyone with a smile that’s dripping with “please die”.

Underwear. It's like a god damned leash. It also constantly reminds me of how funny I look naked.