I'm an insomniac, my mind works the night shift.

He felt like the last bullet in a gun meant for revenge, sealed with a kiss.

I'm not a real big fan of penises. Like my own, whenever I look at it, I just don't find anything attractive about it. I can't believe girls are into it. It blows my mind a little bit.

The hardest part of watching someone watching me is making it appear that I'm not watching.

We are dreamers. We worship love, we hope against hope and toss practicality out the window.

There was a fence and there was this other van- So I go, 'Fence or van? Cause I'm crashing into one of them,' and I said 'Fence,' so I hit the fence and bounced into the van

there’s really nowhere else I can go, and even if there were, it wouldn’t make a difference because I’d just be running from myself, and you can’t do that no matter how hard you try, and trying hard is what got you in this predicament in the first place.