I hate restaurants that play music. You come out for a quiet meal, and you're supposed to put up with all this booming. Why? It's madness!

I wish I'd known that one day the geek would inherit the Earth.

If you actually have to engage with somebody who's superior to you and actually battle with them, struggle with them, I think it's more interesting, and funnier for the audience.

There is no such thing as too much swearing. Swearing is just a piece of linguistic mechanics. The words in-between are the clever ones.

I think that people like the idea that fans are sort of slightly eccentric and strange, but generally I've just found them very creative and warm and cheerful.

A girl once came to my beery flat in Kensal Green, opened the blinds and cooked me breakfast. I married her.

I hate restaurants that play music. You come out for a quiet meal, and you're supposed to put up with all this booming. Why? It's madness!