Most of us would do more for our babies than we have ever been willing to do for anyone, even ourselves.

If we view our children as stupid, naughty, disturbed, or guilty of their misdeeds, they will learn to behold themselves as foolish, faulty, or shameful specimens of humanity. They will regard us as judges from whom they wish to hide, and they will interpret everything we say as further proof of their unworthiness. If we view them as innocent, or at least merely ignorant, they will gain understanding from their experiences, and they will continue to regard us as wise partners.

If we allow our one-and-a-half year old to "help" us fold laundry he will learn something about buttons, zippers, snaps, where things go, the physical properties of cloth, what happens when you drop it, how easy or hard it is to carry compared with everything else he has ever carried, what clean clothes smell like, how a big towel can turn into a small bundle, how the small bundle you just folded can turn into a big towel again, plus any songs we care to sing or stories or related or unrelated facts we care to pass on.

A sense of worthiness is a child's most important need.

The gain is not the having of children; it is the discovery of love and how to be loving.

My list of things I never pictured myself saying when I pictured myself as a parent has grown over the years.

Everything that happens is either a blessing, which is also a lesson, or a lesson which is also a blessing.