But there were other, vaguer, harder-to-pin-down feelings, like: a pit in the stomach that means something is either really good or really bad or both. A feeling of being old and young at once. A sense of beginnings and endings happening at the same time. A certainty that your life is changing, but an uncertainty about how it's changing and whether you want it to.

Generally speaking, books don't cause much harm. Except when you read them, that is. Then they cause all kinds of problems. Books can, for example, give you ideas. I don't know if you've ever had an idea before, but, if you have, you know how much trouble an idea can get you into.

Truth is only stranger than fiction if you're a stranger to the truth. Which means you're either a liar or you're fictional.

Q: Why do you like chocolate so much? A: The answer, clearly, is because I've tasted chocolate.

You know, people always warn children about taking candy from strange adults. But they never warn us adults about taking candy from strange children.

Some secrets are meant to be known- but once known you can never forget them.

The first expert said he had attention deficit disorder. The second expert said the first was out of order. One said he was autistic, another that he was artistic. One said he had Tourette's syndrome. One said he had Asperger's syndrome. And one said the problem was that his parents had Munchausen syndrome. Still another said all he needed was a good old-fashioned spanking.