If Mr. Vincent Price were to be co-starred with Miss Bette Davis in a story by Mr. Edgar Allan Poe directed by Mr. Roger Corman, it could not fully express the pent-up violence and depravity of a single day in the life of the average family.

Nothing shortens a journey so pleasantly as an account of misfortunes at which the hearer is permitted to laugh.

I am the last of Britain's stately homos.

My function in life was to render clear what was already blindingly conspicuous.

Fashion is what you adopt when you don't know who you are.

I don't know how people act. I've never understood that.

The continued propinquity of another human being cramps the style after a time unless that person is somebody you think you love. Then the burden becomes intolerable at once.