The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we hold of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us.

Mainstream people dislike homosexuality because they can't help concentrating on what homosexual men do to one another. And when you contemplate what people do, you think of yourself doing it. And they don't like that. That's the famous joke: I don't like peas, and I'm glad I don't like them, because if I liked them I would eat them and I hate them.

What is privacy if not for invading?

I take it to be axiomatic that people are revolted by witnessing the shameless gratification of an appetite they do not share.

I lost the love of all the homosexuals in the world by saying that Princess Diana was trash and got what she deserved. She could have been Queen of England - and she was swanning about Paris with Arabs. What disgraceful behavior. Going about saying she wanted to be the queen of hearts. The vulgarity of it is so overpowering.

Flowers are words even a baby can understand.

There is no need to do any housework at all. After the first four years the dirt doesn't get any worse.