No one can advise or help you - no one. There is only one thing you should do. Go into yourself. Search for the reason that bids you write, find out wether it spreading out its root in the deepest places of your heart...Delve into yourself for a deep answer
Rainer Maria RilkeLook, we don't love like flowers with only one season behind us; when we love, a sap older than memory rises in our arms.
Rainer Maria RilkeWho has not sat before his own heart's curtain? It lifts: and the scenery is falling apart.
Rainer Maria RilkeOnly the individual who is solitary is like a thing placed under profound laws, and when he goes out into the morning that is just beginning, or looks out into the evening that is full of happening, and if he feels what is going on there, then all status drops from him as from a dead man, though he stands in the midst of sheer life.
Rainer Maria RilkeIf we surrendered to earthโs intelligence we could rise up rooted, like trees. Instead we entangle ourselves in knots of our own making and struggle, lonely and confused. So like children, we begin again... to fall, patiently to trust our heaviness. Even a bird has to do that before he can fly. (from the poem "How Sure Gravity's Law")
Rainer Maria Rilke