I sit here in this chair, I pour myself some whiskey, and watch my troubles vanish into the air.

The radio is blastin', someone's knockin' at the door. I'm lookin' at my girlfriend, she's passed out on the floor.

This one guy's wife is such a pretty brown thing, that I'm liable to give her a poke or two. Whaddaya think of that?

Asia's crowded and Europe's too old, Africa is far too hot and Canada's too cold. And South America stole our name, let's drop the big one.

If getting on the radio was a major motivation, I'd be one of the worst writers of all time. I admire people who do it, and I think it's a nice way to work, but I try to do the best I can and write what I like. I don't worry about it.

If I were to die tomorrow, I think they'd say Newman 56, composer of the hit song, Short People. Jumped off a mountain today.

It's very hard to get rich and famous at a young age and handle it well.