Because you’re such a good salesman, and if you go work for a company, they’re going to use you as a salesman. If you’re going to be a salesman, you might as well be selling something worthwhile, like education

Most people who have told a lie think they got away with it … when in fact, they didn’t

It's easy to be smart when you are parodying smart people.

Showing gratitude is one of the simplest yet most powerful things humans can do for each other.

If you’re going to have childhood dreams you should have great parents who let you pursue them and express your creativity

I didn't know there was a dying-professor section at the bookstore.

Whatever news we get about the scans, I’m not going to die when we hear it. I won’t die the next day, or the day after that, or the day after that. So today, right now, well this is a wonderful day. And I want you to know how much I’m enjoying it.” I thought about that, and about Jai’s smile. I knew then. That’s the way the rest of my life would need to be lived.