music is a missionary effort to colonize earth for imperialistic heaven.

If I do not do sensible things about investments I shall spend my old age in a workhouse, where nobody will understand my jokes.

Here lies the real terror in the international war of ideologies; that a city knows not whom it entertains.

I find to my astonishment that an unhappy marriage goes on being unhappy when it is over.

A great many quite good plays could be performed with rhythmic howls in the place of dialogue and lose almost nothing by the change.

For some reason a nation feels as shy about admitting that it ever went forth to war for the sake of more wealth as a man would about admitting that he had accepted an invitation just for the sake of the food. This is one of humanity's most profound imbecilities, as perhaps the only justification for asking one's fellowmen to endure the horrors of war would be the knowledge that if they did not fight they would starve.

To every man in the world there is one person of whom he knows little: whom he would never recognize if he met him walking down the street, whose motives are a mystery to him. That is himself.