Just because I'm Native American doesn't mean I can track furniture through the wilderness." She deepened her voice: "'Yes, kemosabe. A three-legged table passed this way an hour ago.' Heck, I don’t know.

Suspecting and knowing are not the same.

Felix believed that the answer to every problem involved penguins; but it wasn't fair to birds, and I was getting tired of teleporting them back home. Somewhere in Antarctica, a whole flock of Magellanic penguins were undergoing psychotherapy.

Ever had a flying burrito hit you? Well, it's a deadly projectile, right up there with cannonballs and grenades.

Nico leaned over and plucked a grape. Probably that was the guy’s entire diet for the day.

Oh, don't mind me! Just the queen of the heavens, dying over here!

He was the class clown, the court jester, because he'd learn early that if you cracked jokes and pretended you weren't scared, you usually didn't get beat up. Even the baddest gangster kids would tolerate you, keep you around for laughs. Plus, humor was a good way to hide the pain