[Carter just asked when I became a ram whisperer. Do shut up, Carter]

It is true that I once refused to eat haggis in Scotland and this did not sit well with the local population.

I thought about all the things I was suddenly able to do—like fight with a sword and summon a magical shell of armor. Those were not things I covered in home school.

It's hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one.

Nico leaned over and plucked a grape. Probably that was the guy’s entire diet for the day.

I’m the god of funerals. I know every death custom in the world—how to die properly, how to prepare the body and soul for the afterlife. I live for death.” “You must be fun at parties,” I said.

I am never, ever, going to make things easy for you, Seaweed Brain. Get used to it.