You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.

When compiling his great dictionary, the young Noah Webster travels to the Himalayas, where he climbs to the cave of the world's wises man. 'O, great sage,' he says, 'tell me the meaning of life.' The sage sits Noah at his feet and, with great solemnity, commences to unfold the meaning of life. When finished, he places a hand on the young man's shoulder and says, 'Do you have any other questions, my son?' Noah flips a page in his notebook and says, 'You wouldn't know the meaning of lift, would you?'

If you teach your children nothing else, teach them the Golden Rule and "righty-tighty, lefty-loosey.

Oh, the things that go through my mind that I never say. Oh, the things I say that never go through my mind.

Worse than telling a lie is spending the rest of your life staying true to a lie.

Even if you think the Big Bang created the stars, don't you wonder who sent the flowers?

There is always a perfectly good excuse, always a reason not to. The hardest freedom to win is the freedom from one's excuses.