There are some people who want to throw their arms round you simply because it is Christmas; there are other people who want to strangle you simply because it is Christmas.

Most remarks that are worth making are commonplace remarks. The things that makes them worth saying is that we really mean them.

The telephone is the greatest nuisance among conveniences, the greatest convenience among nuisances.

Cut quarrels out of literature, and you will have very little history or drama or fiction or epic poetry left.

[History is] the story of the magnificent rear-guard action fought during several thousand years by dogma against curiosity.

Most of us believe in trying to make other people happy only if they can be happy in ways which we approve.

I sometimes suspect that half our difficulties are imaginary and that if we kept quiet about them they would disappear.