What you describe is how it happens to everyone: magic does slide through you, and disappear, and come back later looking like something else. And I'm sorry to tell you this, but where your magic lives will always be a great dark space with scraps you fumble for. You must learn to sniff them out in the dark.
Robin McKinleyTsornin's nostrils showed red, but his ears were as alert as ever, and occasionally he would rub his nose gently against the nape of her neck, just in case she was momentarily not thinking about him.
Robin McKinleyWith the knowledge of her aloneness came a rush of self-declaration: โI will not be nothing.โ
Robin McKinley[Harry] had always suffered from a vague restlessness, a longing for adventure that she told herself severely was the result of reading too many novels when she was a small child.
Robin McKinleyHe laughed, tried to make it into a cough, inhaled at exactly the wrong moment, and then really did cough.
Robin McKinley