I don't like to go to premieres or openings. I don't like to have to put on makeup.

I think everyone spins. You would just be an empty vacant shell reporting facts. I mean, you have your life that you bring with you to every moment that happens.

I act irrationally, I defy the odds, I engage when others would run. I look for trouble, I seek chaos, it is a burden.

My life goal is not to ruin anyone's existence. I'm a comic.

I just want to say something. 655,000 Iraqi civilians are dead. Who are the terrorists?

I don't think it negates your skills as a parent if you're homosexual.

I think that once you open the door and allow people in on a certain aspect, it's very hard to then control how far that ripple effect is. So I think that the person who is known or famous has the ability to decide what they do or don't want to share.