I think what's really hard is making sense and making what you write clear and smooth-flowing.

It was easy to make fun of Bush, but it was sort of like shooting fish in a barrel and it didn't really feel all that good because it was so easy to do. I would much rather live under a thoughtful president. Even if it makes it harder to be funny about politics, it makes it more interesting to be funny about politics.

Any given generation gives the next generation advice that the given generation should have been given by the previous generation but now it's too late.

Anyone who undertakes the literary grind had better like playing around with words.

When I weed, I like to get off into my own head. For one thing, my wife plants and I have trouble telling which plants are weeds and which are my favorite plants. So I tend to hop around and grab the weeds that I know are weeds. So I don't weed all that linearly. I tend to weed haphazardly.

If a cat spoke, it would say things like, 'Hey, I don't see the problem here.'

I prefer my oysters fried; that way I know my oysters died.