I am afraid to show you who I really am, because if I show you who I really am, you might not like it--and that's all I got.

The more I look around and listen I realize that I'm not alone. We are all facing choices that define us. No choice. However messy is without importance in the overall picture of our lives. We all at our own age have to claim something, even if it's only our own confusion. I am in the middle of growing up and into myself.

I sat on the bench outside of class today and talked to Jon. I read to him from my journal, it was the part about the accordian player I was watching on the street last weekend. He said that an accordian is such a perfect metaphor for Love, because you are always opening, and closing, shifting, and getting air, and that's how the music happens. True.

Driving to class with him. All I could think about was that it had been three days since I'd touched his face AND HE SEEMED so fine. I said, to him "you seem like you didn't miss a beat." He looked at me and said Sabrina, I've missed so many beats, I've MADE A RhytHM.

I am afraid to show you who I really am, because if I show you who I really am, you might not like it--and that's all I got.

What we don't let out traps us. We think, No one else feels this way, I must be crazy. So we don't say anything. And we become enveloped by a deep loneliness, not knowing where our feelings come from or what to do with them. Why do I feel this way?

I feel quite lost INSIDE myself, like I'm looking for my train tracks for my life, as if they would just appear and solve the growing questions I seem to face (my reflection in the morning).