We were so poor we envied everyone we ever heard of.

Well, there's a Book that says we're all sinners and I at least chose a sin that's made quite a few people happier than they were before they met me, a sin that's left me with very little time to consider other extremely popular moral misdemeanors, like usury, intolerance, bearing false tales, extortion, racial bigotry, and the casting of that first stone.

If you are being run out of town, get in front of the crowd and make it look like a parade.

They were a wonderful set of burglars, the people who were running San Francisco when I first came to town in 1923, wonderful because, if they were stealing, they were doing it with class and style.

Romance without finance is a nuisance. Few men value free merchandise. Let the chippies fall where they may.

Madaming is the sort of thing that happens to you - like getting a battlefield commission or becoming the dean of women at Stanford University.

Like I always say, if you sit long enough by the crack of the door, you'll see your enemy go by in a hearse.