When told a script was full of old cliches: Let's have some new cliches.

I have been laid up with intentional flu.

We have passed a lot of water since then.

In picture-making the writer is the most important cog in the wheel.

The reason so many people turned up at his funeral is that they wanted to make sure he was dead.

When someone does something good, applaud! You will make two people happy.

If I look confused it is because I am thinking.