If friends are taking more from you than they're giving, it doesn't matter if they are in the throes of addiction. It does not matter if they are suicidal. It does not matter if they were nice to you when you were kids. It doesn't matter if you've told them things you've never told anybody else and only they can relate. If this person is draining you, this person is not right for you.
Sara BenincasaThe world will not give you an endowment for your finger-painting. Your finger-painting may be marvelous, but our government and society do not value art adequately. We should fulminate against that and seek to change it, but in the meantime you have to make choices. If you're an artist who likes to have a steady income for yourself, for your children, for your partner, to help you engage in elder care as you take care of your parents or grandparents, that's a good thing.
Sara BenincasaIt's like there's this knowledge hanging in the air that one person has more power than the other, and we're supposed to pretend everything is nice and normal and equal, but in reality, luck or chance has showered benefits on one person that the other person couldn't dream of.
Sara BenincasaMost people don't want to work with liars. They'll work with a liar if the liar makes them money and gives them credit, but not if a person's lying extends to not making them money and not giving them credit.
Sara BenincasaWhat I really wanted wasn't what I thought I was supposed to want. It wasn't what people had told me I should want or that books and movies and TV had put across. What I really wanted was to be a working artist, which I am.
Sara BenincasaIn the short term, it absolutely feels devastating to break a bond of friendship. In the long term, it is the best possible thing. You're actually doing something noble and good if you do it in the right way. You can leave them with, "I wish you the best, but I have to take care of myself." Or you don't have to wish them the best. It's okay if you don't. Maybe they don't deserve the best. That's not up to you to decide. You not wishing someone the best is not going to make anyone's life not the best.
Sara Benincasa