Nothing else ever mattered to me, and you weren’t even real. All I ever wanted was you.

Jared sidled up. He was not very good at sidling; he was more of a loomer.

Not doing things you can do is the whole point of laziness. Not doing something you can't do is just sensible.

Do you mean am I worried about people seeing me with my jeans off? Sure. Sometimes people are overcome. They fall down. They hit their heads. It's worrying.

He had called girls to him before. There was nothing so easy whether you were walking into a classroom, a club, or down the street. All you had to do was send out the right signals, give her the right look, turn your body the right way, and never for a moment let it cross your mind that she might not be interested.

I'd rather live laughing for one year than live without laughing for one hundred.

It’s bits of dead cow; don’t ask it to perform miracles.