My dad told me that when I was born my cheeks were so fat the doctors didn't know which end to spank.

If you're planning on dropping out of high school, prepare yourself for the future by repeating aloud each day: 'I'm looking forward to low-paying jobs for the rest of my life.'

Small changes can make huge destination differences.

Isn't it kind of silly to think that tearing someone else down builds you up?

These problems are real, and you can't turn off real life. So I won't try. Instead, I'll give you a set of tools to help you deal with real life.

If you decide to just go with the flow, you'll end up where the flow goes, which is usually downhill, often leading to a big pile of sludge and a life of unhappiness. You'll end up doing what everyone else is doing.

Instead of playing to win, I was playing not to lose. It reminds me of the story I once heard about two friends being chased by a bear, when one turned to the other and said, "I just realized that I don't need to outrun the bear; I only need to outrun you.