To me life is simply an invitation to live.

If church prelates, past or present, had even an inkling of physiology they'd realize that what they term this inner ugliness creates and nourishes the hearing ear, the seeing eye, the active mind, and energetic body of man and woman, in the same way that dirt and dung at the roots give the plant its delicate leaves and the full-blown rose.

Jesus, Buddha, Mohammed, great as each may be, their highest comfort given to the sorrowful is a cordial introduction into another's woe. Sorrow's the great community in which all men born of woman are members at one time or another.

It's my rule never to lose me temper till it would be detrimental to keep it.

Politics - I don't know why, but they seem to have a tendency to separate us, to keep us from one another, while nature is always and ever making efforts to bring us together.

A laugh is the loud echo of a sigh; a sigh the faint echo of a laugh.

Nothing seems too high or low for the humorist; he is above honor, above faith, preserving sense in religion and sanity in life.