I think the new ball is terrible. It's the worst decision some expert, whoever did it, made. It's terrible. It's like touching an exotic dancer and then going and touching a plastic blow-up doll. You know, it feels different.

No one was there. Some teammates, huh? I guess they didn't want to get their lip busted like the gentleman I busted. Sorry for that sir.

I don't think anything of Laura Frank. You heard me - Laura Frank. Not Lawrence. Laura... It's not that I blame him, I just wish he'd go to a manly tactic and just fight me. Don't whine. When he whines, that's when I change his name of Lawrence Frank.

I'm not a young jitterbug anymore. When I was a young jitterbug, I never won. I didn't start winning until I got older. The older I get, the wiser I get. You just have to play it smart.

You know what's crazy about Yao? He speaks perfect English. A lot of people don't know that. Perfect English. When I was over there, I called him. He's like, 'Whassup big fella?' Perfect English!

I'm George Bush. I'm the president.

I know how to turn the bad into good always.