I'm the NBA's best NFL player, and I've always been the sexiest 7-footer in the NBA - for 12 years running.

It was a weird game. There was ugly shooting and a lot of turnovers and mistakes, and we were just fortunate to get the win. I should have done better, but it was just a very ugly and weird game... I knew the game was going to be an ugly game when I saw those three guys at the scorer's table. Ugly people call ugly games.

Do we play Chicago again? I going to hit Othella Harrington right in the mouth. If he didn't have his clumsy ass on the floor, I wouldn't have fell. How he got on the ground, I don't know. He's clumsy. Quote me on that. I'm going to get him.

I think he got an incidental elbow in the face, messed up his pretty red lips a little bit. But other than that he'll be fine.

The Miami Heat has the best fans.

And I want to do it the right way, like everybody else, not just a famous figurehead that gets a job because he is a famous basketball player. I want to really learn the business.

If you take a needle and stick her in the booty and take a needle and stick me in the booty, we're both going to say ouch.