If you sprinkle when you tinkle please be neat and wipe the seat.

The reason I want you to put a shirt on is, well, because, um..." "You've never seen a guy with his shirt off?" "Ha, ha. Very funny. Believe me, you don't have anything I haven't seen before." "Wanna bet?" he says, then moves his hands to the button on his jeans and pops it open. Isabel walks in at that exact moment. "Whoa, Alex. Please keep your pants on.

Expectations make people miserable, so whatever yours are, lower them. You'll definitely be happier.

If no words come, you can always give him the finger.

It'd be cool if God gave everyone a Do Over Day and you could yell "Do Over!" and the day would start new.

Something is happening. I sense a change in the wind…a mutual understanding of each other. I haven’t felt this way in forever.

I gave you my heart, but it wasn't enough.