The truth is, I wrote a novel when I was 23. It's hideously bad. Truly rotten.

When you spin a globe and point to a city and actually go to that city, you build an allowance of missed opportunities on the back end.

Brits and Americans have hundreds of different phrases for the same thing. Luckily, it's usually a source of amusement rather than frustration. A flashlight by any other name is still a torch. My personal favourite is 'fairy lights,' which we boringly refer to as 'Christmas lights.'

You feel like telling him you're not single in the way that he thinks you're single. After all, you have yourself. I think a lot of humor is about distracting yourself. Pretend you're not trying to make it funny. Because for some reason the effort to be funny smells like sulphur in our culture.

In every woman's wardrobe, there are certain accessories that cannot be separated from their back stories.

Not all shabby is chic, just like not every porn actor is a star.

It's never good to fall in love with someone whom you'd have to stab in the eyeballs to elicit a response.