Sam dropped me off. When she was too far away to see me, I started to cry again. Because she was my friend again. And that was enough for me.

there is this one photograph... that is just beautiful. it would be impossible to describe how beautiful it is, but i’ll try. if you listen to the song “asleep,” and you think about those pretty weather days that make you remember things, and you think about the prettiest eyes you’ve known, and you cry and the person holds you back, then i think you will see the photograph.

The reason I am thinking so far in advance is because school is terribly lonely. I think I've said that before, but it's getting harder every day.

When we were all getting ready to leave, I walked up to my grandfather and gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. He wiped my lip print off with his palm and gave me a look. He doesn't like the boys in the family to touch him. But I'm very glad that I did it anyway in case he dies. I never got to do that with my Aunt Helen.

Patrick started running after the sunset. And Sam immediately followed him. And I saw them in silhouette. Running after the sun.

I know that things get worse before they get better because that’s what my psychiatrist says, but this is a worse that feels too big.

Despite everything my mom and doctor and dad have said to me about blame, I can't stop thinking what I know. And I know that my aunt Helen would still be alive today if she just bought me one present like everybody else. She would be alive if I were born on a day that didn't snow.