There are lots of guys out there who write a better prose line than I do and who have a better understanding of what people are really like and what humanity is supposed to mean - hell, I know that.

The one thing about kids is that you never really know exactly what they're thinking or how they're seeing. After writing about kids, which is a little bit like putting the experience under a magnifying glass, you realize you have no idea how you thought as a kid. I've come to the conclusion that most of the things that we remember about our childhood are lies. We all have memories that stand out from when we were kids, but they're really just snapshots. You can't remember how you reacted because your whole head is different when you stand aside.

I understand from my own work that haste makes waste. But I also understand that ... the creative spark dims, and then death puts it out. William Shakespeare, for instance, hasn’t produced a new play for 400 years. That, my friends, is a long dry spell.

In the stutter-flashes of light, the clouds look like huge transparent brains filled with bad thoughts.

If I can get it down on paper without puking all over the word processor, then as far as I'm concerned, it's fit to see the light of day.

It was as hysterical as a woman having a hot flash.

Poe was the first writer to write about main characters who were bad guys or who were mad guys, and those are some of my favorite stories.