Love is essential; gregariousness is optional. Cherish your nearest and dearest. Work with colleagues you like and respect. Scan new acquaintances for those who might fall into the former categories or whose company you enjoy for its own sake. And don't worry about socializing with everyone else. Relationships make everyone happier, introverts included, but think quality over quantity.
Susan CainI get a lot of letters from introverts asking how they can meet people. The key is to make sure that you are doing things you enjoy.
Susan CainIntroverts often work more slowly and deliberately. They like to focus on one task at a time and can have mighty powers of concentration . They're relatively immune to the lures of wealth and fame.
Susan CainAsk your child for information in a gentle, nonjudgmental way, with specific, clear questions. Instead of โHow was your day?โ try โWhat did you do in math class today?โ Instead of โDo you like your teacher?โ ask โWhat do you like about your teacher?โ Or โWhat do you not like so much?โ Let her take her time to answer. Try to avoid asking, in the overly bright voice of parents everywhere, โDid you have fun in school today?!โ Sheโll sense how important it is that the answer be yes.
Susan CainSo stay true to your own nature. If you like to do things in a slow and steady way, don't let others make you feel as if you have to race. If you enjoy depth, don't force yourself to seek breadth. If you prefer single-tasking to multi-tasking, stick to your guns. Being relatively unmoved by rewards gives you the incalculable power to go your own way.
Susan CainMany Introverts are also "highly sensitive," which sounds poetic, but is actually a technical term in psychology. If you are a sensitive sort, then you're more apt than the average person to feel pleasantly overwhelmed by Beethoven's "Moonlight Sonata" or a well-turned phrase or an act of extraordinary kindness. You may be quicker than others to feel sickened by violence and ugliness, and you likely have a very strong conscience.
Susan Cain