Christians are losers.

I know what I'm having 'em put on my tombstone: 'I have nothing more to say'.

Basically we are chimpanzees with about two percent more intelligence and a little less hair.

The worst thing you can do if you want to start a fight is to use derogatory terminology.

I like snakes. I like hummingbirds. There's nothing on earth I don't like. Frogs. Salamanders. The bunnies, the giraffes, the hippopotamuses.

I have both sleep apnea and atrial fibrillation, which are both debilitating conditions.

Newspapers are technologically obsolete. In the days of instant electronic communications, its crazy to have to print these newspapers at a central plant and deliver them by truck. They're the biggest problem with our solid-waste disposal. And the news you get is a day old. You can get it off the Internet instantaneously for a fraction of the cost.