Take it from me, whenever you see a bunch of buggers puttering around talking about truth and beauty and the best way of attacking Ethics, you can bet your sandals it's all because dozens of other poor buggers are doing all the real work around the place.

The kind of accidents you prefer to call...accidents.

Oh, a very useful philosophical animal, your average tortoise. Outrunning metaphorical arrows, beating hares in races... very handy.

In all seriousness, people think that it's the ideas that are important. Well, everyone has ideas, all the time. I tend to write mine down and remember them, but at some point you have to apply the bum to the seat and knock out about sixty five thousand words - that's how long a novel is.

Cats will amusingly tolerate humans only until someone comes up with a tin opener that can be operated with a paw.

The librarians were mysterious. It was said they could tell what book you needed just by looking at you, and they could take your voice away with a word.

I didn't go to university. Didn't even finish A-levels. But I have sympathy for those who did.