If you really want to upset a witch, do her a favor which she has no means of repaying. The unfulfilled obligation will nag at her like a hangnail.

They say that there can never be two snowflakes that are exactly alike, but has anyone checked lately?

How do you get all those coins?" asked Mort. IN PAIRS.

Maybe the only significant difference between a really smart simulation and a human being was the noise they made when you punched them.

There is always a choice." "You mean I could choose certain death?" "A choice nevertheless, or perhaps an alternative. You see I believe in freedom. Not many people do, although they will of course protest otherwise. And no practical definition of freedom would be complete without the freedom to take the consequences. Indeed, it is the freedom upon which all the others are based.

Rincewind gave his fingers a long shocked stare, as one might regard a gun that has been hanging on the wall for decades and has suddenly gone off and perforated the cat.

Oh, there's plenty of reasons. I just don't know which one.